Stories to Share

I blogged earlier about adoption and since then two things have happened today that I also wanted to share.

In the car today, we were listening to the Christian radio station and a man called in to request a song for two little girls having an end of the year swim party at their house. I thought that was sweet and it got me thinking about the responsibility of having a large group of children swimming on their own in a pool I owned. Scary. That thought led me to 1994 when I was 15 and a family in our church lost their 5 year old little boy when he drowned in a friend's pool. They weren't even swimming that day, but the little boy wandered away from the group and after being missing for only a few minutes, his teenage brother found him at the bottom of the pool. He actually lived for nearly a week on life support, but there was nothing they could do for him because they had also found an inoperable brain tumor that had been with him since conception. That was a horrific time in all of our lives watching that family grieve. Thinking about that made me think how thankful I am to Raylen by herself right now without other siblings until she matures. In my quiet moments, I long to add to our family, but with the very curious and energetic personality of our daughter, God knows exactly what He's doing. It takes all of my energy and attention to keep her from wandering off. Accidents will happen and having only one child does not prevent terrible things from occurring, but it gave me pause to be content and thankful in my current circumstance and not let my desires shadow God's provision in my life.

Secondly, this evening I am cleaning my house in preparation for my sister in law and her family to come and visit this weekend. I found myself bent over Raylen's bathtub scrubbing the ring of dirt that sticks after being washed from her active body. Raylen came to me, tapped me on the shoulder and told me "Mommy, God is telling me to give Him my heart." I think the scrub brush dropped out of my hand. "What did you say?" I asked her. "God wants me to give Him my heart, Mommy" a statement she made while gesturing toward Heaven. We entered into a conversation about how and why God loves us and what it means for us to trust Him and call Him Saviour. After we wrapped it up, I asked her if she wanted to tell Daddy and she went to him and repeated everything just as she told me. I can't tell you the thrill I have knowing that Raylen is hearing God and more importantly listening to Him! I have to give a shout out to our church and Pastor Cris and all the children's staff that are committed to teaching children, no matter what age the foundations of our faith. Above everything, we know that when we drop Raylen off at her class on Sundays, she is being taught Biblical truths that encourage her to follow Christ. We do our best as parents to teach her these things daily, but we know that we can't follow her in the world forever and so we rely on these teachers, her grandparents, her aunts and uncles, etc. to join us in shaping her faith. How exciting it is to watch her faith grow!

Raylen's Day Out

I have been extremely busy the last several weeks with a lot of projects. So, when my boss gave me today off to go along with the Memorial Day holiday, I decided to give Raylen the day. My decision was even more cemented after hearing about Maria Chapman, knowing that although I can't live in fear of what might be, I need to treasure each moment I have with Raylen and truly enjoy our time together. So, Raylen's Day became an official holiday in our house and we made the most of it.

We started out early and went to Log Cabin Village in Fort Worth. This was one of my favorite places as a child to go. If you've never been, it's a must see. For a minimal cost, you can experience several authentic log cabins and school house from the 1800's that are of local origination. One of the houses in particular, is set up as a "Hands On House" where the kids can actually play dress up, try out the feather bed, "cook" in the hearth, gather eggs from the "chickens" and pump water from a well. Raylen loved it and looked especially cute in my hand me down bonnet. The period people kept calling her Laura Ingalls.

After Log Cabin Village, we headed to Montgomery Street Antique Mall. We walked around for a while and Raylen did EXCELLANT at her first attempt to walk in a big store with breakables without being strapped in a stroller or buggy. I was especially excited that Raylen is learning to love old things, like I do (and her G-Da and Nawni do). We found some great bargains on the Value Tales Series of books that I read as a child and we are excited to start collecting now. After our shopping, we went to the store's Rose Garden Tea Room where we met up with G-Da (my mom) and had a delicious lunch. Raylen got a complement from another customer who admired how she behaved.

We made a brief stop at Dairy Queen for some yummy ice cream dessert. Dairy Queens are in short supply around here so it was fun to experience it again. As you can see, Raylen couldn't get enough.

Then, it was on to the Forest Park Train Ride. This train has been making trips around the Trinity River trails of Fort Worth for many, many years. My mom told me today that she remembers riding it as a child and I remember it fondly as well. Raylen loves train rides and we had a great and breezy time on this nostalgic train.

We were pretty pooped after the train ride, but we met up with Daddy and Uncle Joey at Joe's Crab Shack to eat some dinner. Raylen found energy somewher to play with her Uncle Joey and steal his Longhorn cap. By the way, Hook 'em Horns!

And after some unfortunate tears and cries of "I don't want to go home", we did indeed head home. The girl who said she wasn't sleepy is now, well, you tell me if she was sleepy or not.

Raylen's New Car

On Friday, Raylen and I passed a garage sale in our neighborhood and a pink Barbie Powerwheels jeep called to her. I just new it would be too high for us because I have been scouting one of these cars on Craigslist for a while. Much to my suprise and Raylen's joy, the car was very affordable and it came with a brand new battery. We picked it up later that night and she actually drove it back to our house. It's surreal trying to teach your 3 1/2 year old to drive! It wasn't long before she figured out our dachsund, Molli Brown would fit in the "back seat" compartment. They both were in heaven....

The Glue That Holds Us Together

I received this as a forward from my friend Renee who got it from on of her friends Alissa. I loved it and had to pass it along.

"A couple of days ago I was running (I use that term very loosely) on my treadmill, watching a DVD sermon by Louie Giglio...and I was BLOWN AWAY! I want to share what I learned...but I fear not being able to convey it as well as I want. I will share anyway.

He (Louie) was talking about how inconceivably BIG our God is...how He spoke the universe into being...how He breathes stars out of His mouth that are huge raging balls of fire...etc. etc. Then He went on to speak of how this star-breathing, universe creating God ALSO knitted our human bodies together with amazing detail and wonder. At this point I am LOVING it (fascinating from a medical standpoint, you know.) .....and I was remembering how I was constantly amazed during medical school as I learned more and more about God's handiwork. I remember so many times thinking...."How can ANYONE deny that a Creator did all of this???"

Louie went on t o talk about how we can trust that the God who created all this, also has the power to hold it all together when things seem to be falling apart...how our loving Creator is also our sustainer.

And then I lost my breath. . .And it wasn't because I was running my treadmill, either!!!

It was because he started talking about laminin.I knew about laminin.

Here is how wikipedia describes them :"Laminins are a family of proteins that are an integral part of the structural scaffolding of basement membranes in almost every animal tissue." You see....laminins are what hold us together....LITERALLY. They are cell adhesion molecules. They are what holds one cell of our bodies to the next cell. Without them, we would literally fall apart. And I knew all this already.

But what I didn't know is what laminin LOOKED LIKE. But now I do. And I have thought about it a thousand times since (already)....

Here is what the structure of laminin looks like...AND THIS IS NOT a "Christian portrayal" of it....if you look up laminin in any scientific/medical piece of literature, this is what you will see...

Now tell me that our God is not the coolest!!! Amazing.The glue that holds us together....ALL of us....is in the shape of the cross.

Immediately Colossians 1:15-17 comes to mind.

"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created; things in heaven and on earth , visible and invisible,whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things HOLD TOGETHER." Colossians 1:15-17

Call me crazy. I just think that is very, very, very cool. Thousands of years before the world knew anything about laminin, Paul penned those words. And now we see that from a very LITERAL standpoint, we are held together...one cell to another....by the cross.

You would never in a quadrillion years convince me that is anything other than the mark of a Creator who knew EXACTLY what laminin "glue" would look like long before Adam even breathed his first breath!! We praise YOU, Lord!!"

Happy Mother's Day!

I had a great mother's day today. Jason and Raylen suprised me with a card and roses this morning and gave me a day at the spa in the next few weeks for me to relax! After church, we snapped some pics with my mom and my brother Justin and his girlfriend and her two precious little boys. (If you are wondering where Joey is, he overslept and didn't make it to church.) After lunch, Mom, Raylen and I went to the mall and Raylen got to ride Thomas the Tank. I am very thankful to be Raylen's mommy.

Instant Friends

Later on at the lake....

After PaPa's party, we went to my cousin Amber's inlaw's house on the lake and let the kids swim. They had a great time and when the water got too cold, they jumped in the hot tub. Laney, Raylen and Jordan

Jordan, Raylen and Jamie

Happy Birthday PaPa!

Friday was my PaPa's 79th birthday. He hasn't been feeling so well and has recently found out he has cancer. We are not sure what the prognosis is at this point, but we all decided it would be fun to suprise him with a cookout and birthday party at his house on Saturday.
We went easy on him and replaced 79 candles with a question mark.

Granny playing horshoes

Uncle Joey and Raylen

The Bikini Cousins

Jamie, Raylen and Laney

Fun in Abilene

Last weekend, we were able to go to Abilene to visit Jason's family. Raylen had a great time playing with her cousins.

Uncle Jason, Madisyn, Dylan and Raylen

At the mall playground

A wagon just his size!

Playing Dress Up

Ella and Raylen

Beautiful Princesses
And Baby Jesse looks on....

A quick update

Just a quick update on the situation with baby Amanda. We have not heard anything in almost a week, but since my last post, I did talk to the case worker again to see if she had talked to the birth mother yet. She had not and was in the process of transferring all of the case information over to a new case worker. I was frustrated at the thought of a new case worker coming into the situation and my frustration was compounded when the current worker wouldn't give me the name and/or phone number for the new worker. I asked some "hypothetical" questions concerning the case and she wouldn't tell me much about that either. I was so frustrated with the situation and told myself to again "let it go". Jason and I talked a lot about it this weekend and just like our time before Raylen, he is not of the nature (as I am) to rehash things over and over and analyze them. He said that if it happens it happens. He is right, I know. My hopes are not up, but my heart is heavy and can't shake the incomplete feeling. Incomplete in the fact that nothing is settled and we are still up in the air. So many of you have left comments or emailed encouragement and heavy hearts for the situation and each time it remotivates me to pray. Thank you.

Whatever happens, we are praying protection, blessings and a firm future in Christ for Amanda. I hope that you will continue to pray with us.....

An Update

In an earlier post, I wrote about Raylen's biological half sister that is in CPS custody. We have not had any contact with anyone concerning the case up till now. We have continued to keep her on our hearts, but have refrained from telling Raylen about the situation. A week or so ago, we had even decided to just "let it go" in our hearts and that day, Raylen came to me out of the blue and begged me to come help her sister who was crying. I had no idea what she was talking about because she doesn't know anything about the situation or know about the word sister in reference to herself at all. She was in panic, and I thinking that she was talking about her baby doll or something, asked her to show me where her sister was. She couldn't tell me and said she didn't know, but that she could hear her crying and that I needed to help her. I was floored. I assured her that I would help her and she calmed down immediately, said okay and went off to play. That was enough motivation for me to keep praying.

Last night, I had a missed call while I was in church from a number I didn't know. This morning, I felt led to call the CPS case worker for an update and when I went to dial the number I realized it matched the one I missed from the night before. In talking with the worker, I found that she is still pushing for the birth mother to place the baby with us. She feels it is the right thing to do to keep the girls together. She said it was no guarrantee, but if the parental rights were terminated, she wanted the girls to be together. She told us some of the stories that the birth mother has been saying about us that aren't true-I'm sure an effort to hold on to her parental rights.

At this moment, the worker is trying to contact the mother again to talk her into letting us keep the baby. Please pray concerning this. We are open and our home is open, but we want the best for Raylen and the baby and God's will in this situation. I will keep you posted.